AITAH for making my D&D players over-encumbered with 2,000 pounds of gold coins?

I was digging into the Equipment chapter of the Dungeons & Dragons 2024 Player's Handbook. All too often equipment costs fall by the wayside—at least after their initial buy-in during character creation.

For example, were I making a fresh 1st level Fighter, I'd simply grab my starting equipment, which is some basic weapons, armor, and a dungeoneer's pack (rope, rations, torches, etc.) Then I'd pick a Farmer background (giving me a sickle, carpenter's tools, healer's kit, etc.) and 30 gold pieces to boot. I'm on my way. 

During my Fighter's adventures, I'd be revisiting the weapons and armor lists several more times, especially during the first half dozen levels as I'm anxiously purchasing better offense and defense.

But my Dungeon Master probably wouldn't make me revisit the full page of adventuring gear ever again. Look, DM, I'm 5th level. Are you really making me backtrack to town to pick up a bucket and a bedroll?

I wanted a scenario that would exercise our logistics muscles. I generally let them off the hook too easily when it comes to tracking encumbrance, food, travel expenses...tracking anything, really. So, what would it look like if we did track some of it, just this once? Here's what I'd ask them to do:

Purchase the services of a mage that can cast you a Wish spell.

Sounds easy enough? If you're not tracking things in the Equipment chapter, then yes. Not a problem. Barely an inconvenience. But in this scenario, we're doing the math.

• Wish is a 9th level spell. According to the Spellcasting Services chart, that'll be 100,000 gold pieces.

My party happens to have 100K in gold. Amazing! But this high-powered mage is located in the Tower of High Sorcery 1,000 miles away. How do we get the gold there? And here's the kicker: How do we get the gold there using only things found in the Equipment chapter of the Player's Handbook? In other words, without using magic.

First off, we have to consider coin weight. One coin weighs about one-third of an ounce, so 50 coins weigh one pound. 

• 100,000 coins weigh 2,000 pounds.

If the party used their own carry capacity, it would take eight characters with 18 Strength each to carry 2,000 pounds. That's impractical, so let's get a wagon.

• According to the Tack, Harness, and Drawn Vehicles chart, a wagon weighs 400 pounds and costs 35 gold pieces. It doesn't list how much weight you can put into it. Instead it directs you to the pull weight of the animals towing it.

To pull that wagon, we'll need mules.

• According to the Mounts and Other Animals chart, a mule can carry 420 pounds. It can pull five times that amount behind it. So one mule can pull 2,100 pounds. That's barely enough for the 2,000 pounds of gold, let alone the 400-pound wagon, so we'll take two mules. But if one mule goes down, we're stuck, so let's make it a team of four mules yoked together. At eight gold apiece, our total cost is 32 gold.

Under different circumstances I would make the party hire half a dozen skilled hirelings from the Hirelings chart to help fend off inevitable bandit and monster attacks on this 100,000-gold-piece-hauling wagon. But these are D&D 5e characters. For all intents and purposes, they're Marvel superheroes. They can handle their own security needs.

So, we've got our horse and buggy. Or rather our mule team and wagon. But to reach our destination, these spin doctors will have to walk 500 miles, then walk 500 more, to be the men who walked a thousand miles to fall down at the Tower of High Sorcery.

• According to the Travel Pace chart, they'll cover 24 miles per day at a normal pace. That means they'll cover 1,000 miles in 42 days.

But the mules have to eat.

• Back to the Tack, Harness, and Drawn Vehicles chart, feed is five copper pieces per day. Times four mules over 42 days is 840 copper, or about eight gold. A pittance!
• Stabling at night for the mules is five silver pieces. Times four mules over 42 days is 840 silver, or about 84 gold. Still not terrible!

This would be unlikely, but we'll assume there's a small town waiting at the end of each of those 42 days of travel, hence the stabling costs above, and the room and board costs below.

• According to the Food, Drink, and Lodging chart, our party of four adventurers will acquire "Comfortable" accommodations at eight silver per night, times four adventurers, times 42 days. That's a grand total of 1,344 silver, or 134 gold to make sure they don't go hungry or wake up miserable on our Lord of the Rings-length walk.

Also on this journey, they'll need to commission ship's passage from the town of Port o' Call in Solamnia to the town of Crossing in Abanasinia—a convenient distance of only 24 miles.

• According to the Travel chart, ship's passage is one silver per mile (per humanoid and animal, I'm assuming—ignoring the 2,400-pound wagon), tacking 24 silver times four mules and four party members, is 192 silver or 19 gold, onto our expenses.

After 42 days, our adventurers have made the 1,000-mile journey to the Tower of High Sorcery where our Wish spell awaits. Aside from the 100,000 gold on the Spellcasting Services chart for a 9th level spell, we spent a total of:

• (1) wagon = 35 gp
• (4) mules = 32 gp
• (42) days of animal feed for four mules = 8 gp
• (42) days of stabling for four mules = 84 gp
• (42) days of comfortable room and board for four adventurers = 134 gp
• (24) miles of ship's passage = 19 gp

Our grand total of expenditures is 312 gold. Not bad for getting 100,000 gold pieces transported 1,000 miles the old fashioned way. Doing it magically, by paying for even one Teleportation spell or purchasing multiple Bags of Holding would exponentially cost more.

Boy did I get lost in the weeds on this one. But if magic were not an option, at least we know it can be done.